That Smile, That Beautiful Lie

You know what?

If I'd decided to write this blog post like 3 hours ago, it would have been terrible because almost everything about today has been terrible...you know...it was just one of those days, where you get attacked from all sides...even your allies are being jerks and all you can do is take all the shizz like a boss.

or you can cry the snot out...which I did by the way.

I think my eyes are all out of tears.

Lets just put it this way, you work our ass off on something for over 4 months and then someone destroys it along with £50 worth of your other stuff.

I guess you have the right to be upset and irritable.

And then I get my head bitten off by someone else who should know better...even if I was being, slightly...mocking....I've received worse from the other party and never even flinched.

Really, not impressive.

but, oh well, at least it was real flesh and blood feelings and not some flat fakery.

but congratulations, my feelings were hurt once again...and I just wish I could be mad, but all I get is this empty feeling in the pit of my stomach and I think its just sheer disappointment.

I guess it was all a lie about not expecting things from other people....you must have expected something from me for to react like that.

Don't worry though...I expect more from you too.... so I guess we are square.

AND

I'm really craving chicken.

So putting today's horribleness aside, I'm trying to find some way that I can somehow learn a lesson from the crappyness....and the lesson is -

You can't let people know how you feel, because they will destroy you

and also

Everyone else but you is allowed to be angry at life.

Erm....positives?

I'm incapable of being angry for more than an hour.

Seriously, when this all happened I was swearing that I would never do anything for anyone ever again.

but I just can't live like that.

It kills you from the inside.

I think getting disappointed once in a while by the people you love and care about is much better than never even caring at all.

What's the point in living if you never feel anything?

You know,

You just want to kiss away all the BS that makes life a drag.



....I really wanted to use that GIF kekeke

Regina George is awesome....

So is Rachel Mcadams, but I like her best in The Notebook.

Which I may watch tomorrow...although it may induce tears...if I have any left.

And its late so I will crash into my pillow.

Sorry for my hugely negative post,

Goodnight!!

Love Minnie

P.S. I want to eat cookies and I think baby goats are extremely cute.