There are Billions of Stars yet We Will Never Get Used to How Beautiful Each One Is On Its Own

I thought I would start this post early in the day as opposed to the usual midnight rush.

My mind is so awake and I'm just sat on my bed looking at my messy room and thinking.

'I should get up off my butt, I should get up off my butt, I should get up off my butt.'

The thing is though...all this thinking just isn't working, cos there is minimal movement haha.

And my right calve itches like craziness, and by calf I mean my triceps surae muscle, not an infant bovine.

AHAHA look at me all awesome with my mad scientific terminology skillz!!!

*cough*

So the thing is, there are three things I want/have to do today.

NUMBER ONE - clean the hoover filter and then hoover the entire house (again) even though I did it yesterday because mum said it didn't pick up the dirt because the filter is too clogged (she is probably right, but I feel so 'DO NOT CARE' right now and I know its bad of me because my dogs hairs look nasteh on my mum and dad's carpet, but I am so selfish *feels bad*)

NUMBER TWO - Finish my drawing of myself...I thought I had lost it earlier and was freaking out saying,

'ITS NOT SITTING ON THE PILE OF CLOTHES I LEFT IT ON.'

but then I remembered I'd decided to scan it earlier this morning and it is most probably still face down in the scanner feeling all sorry for itself because it was forgotten

...

wait, pictures don't think do they.

I wish they did, wouldn't it be nice to be able to just jump into a picture?

It's a weird baby dream, but MEHEH!

NUMBER THREE - I want to go to Rothwell and check my bank account to see if my job seekers allowance has arrived yet. I hope it has because its been over a month now and I could use a bit of cash and it should be there because I didn't go through that mind numbing process FOR NOTHING.

IF it is there I want to take 2/3 of it and shove it into Sarah's savings account, because it will be safe there and wont be spent of big bang merchandise which I will be so tempted to buy.

I also want to buy ingredients so I can bake a lovely and delicious cake.

I don't know what occasion the cake will be for...but it will definitely be a special occasion.

maybe it will be 'The Enlightenment of Minnie' Cake or the 'This Was a Wonderful Day' Cake or the 'Minnie was less of a Noob Today' cake or the 'YAY Someone Went Out of Their Way to be Nice to Me Today' Cake.

but I guess I will just cross that road when I come to it...finding a reason for a cake is hard! :D

----

I just saw a quote that is sad but true

'Unable to love each other,

the English turn naturally to dogs.'

- J.R. Ackerley

...I know it's true because I'm guilty XD....oh dear.

----

Anyway, I better get started on completing the goals I have set for myself today...and I really want to do number three first but actually number one is the task I SHOULD do first...*not impressed face*

...30minuteslater...

Yeah, that was just a damp squib...I'm so irritated now.

So I took the filter from the hoover and emptied all the dust and crap that was inside of it and then...I just COULD NOT put the lid back on it...it just wont go back on at all, which means I can't fit it back into the hoover, which means I can't hoover, which means mum will be annoyed at me...but I really CANT fit it back on.

You know when something doesn't go smoothly and you get all hot and asjdfhaskjf and have to go lie down and chill for a bit before you explode.

It was one of those moments.

Its a killer - the day I actually do try to make an effort...and it still ends up looking like I didn't try at all.

That's how mum will see it anyway....*sigh*

Maybe the cake should be a 'Sorry Mummy for being Rubbish at Everything' cake....EISH!

----

AND THEN!!!!

I went and checked my account and the moths flew out of it =.=''

NOTHING --- complete and utter emptiness...well there was £5, but that doesn't count, because you can't withdraw less than £10.

ASODUJKASL DIASLKDASDBOJAS OH TODAY!!!!

I HAD SUCH HIGH HOPES FOR YOU!!! WHAT HAPPENED?!!!!

Look, this was my first tweet this morning -

Tummy hurts but today I'm on high ground!! Lets have good one shall we ? :Dabout 12 hours ago via web

And this is my most recent tweet -

nubcak

My laptop is refusing to play flashplayer again =.= It keeps crashing everytime I try *sigh*22 minutes ago via web

Can you see the change in attitude?

So out of my three tasks of the day, I only completed one - which was the one to finish my self portrait.

And the more I look at the finished product, the more I find fault in it, which is sad.

Ah what a day!

BUT! I will not be got down! NEVER!

I found something interesting today.

Blogger has got a new stats thingy so I can check my visitor flow a lot more efficiently...unless its not new at all and I've just never found it until now...

Which is a very possible theory, knowing how very nubcak I am.

BUT I'VE BEEN WAITING TO LOOK AT THIS FOR AGES!

It's scary actually, looking at these stats, you realize just how many people are reading your rubbish...I hope to goodness your brains aren't turning into mushy goo.

Its also quite surprising where most of the traffic comes from too - not what I would expect at all MUAHAHAH.

I feel kind of powerful, seeing all this data in front of me.

I feel like a god on mount olympus...

(I happen to be Artemis by the way!!! She's an awesome goddess who sets her dogs on men who try and seduce her and her companions)

*cough*

Anyway, this is my finished self portrait -

I still feel as if I could have made it better (the right eye is SOOO dodgy) - but I have learned some things from drawing it, so I'm glad of that at least.

HWAITING!!!!!!

---

You know what I love about families?

The fact that you can do something totally abnormal and they wont even blink an eyelid.

For example, yesterday, I was happily sat on my bed drawing, when suddenly a wasp flew right into my face.

It was so close I actually thought it was caught in between my glasses and my face.

Now usually, if I came into close contact with a wasp I would calmly catch it and set it free, but on this occasion, it was WAY too close for comfort.

My reaction was to scream my gut out and to the untrained ear, I suspect I sounded a little like a cat being strangled.

For my family members however it must have sounded something like this -

*soft voice*

'Oh no, don't worry about me, I'm completely fine.'

because not one person even shouted upstairs to see what was wrong.

I have no idea where the wasp went after that, the poor thing...trapped in this madhouse.

---

OH YEAH!

Remember how I said in an earlier post that I'd put some of my old uni textbooks up on Amazon to sell?

Well this evening one of them was purchased!

This makes me very happy...AT LAST SOME MONEY!

It was my Zoo Management one - goodbye giraffe face! I'm grateful towards you because at least I actually passed that exam.

-----

My mum is asking me for help with computery stuff!!

I'm the wrongest person she could ever ask...I'm TERRIBLE at anything IT.

It takes me ages to teach myself anything and even longer for other people to teach me things.

I'm just happy to know the very basic things (even though it would be nice to learn to PS).

----

Also, I googled 'nubcak' today, just because I was bored...and it had some very interesting results.

I'm just glad everyone I know doesn't know about this other name that I have.

but anyway, I have a habit of writing very large and ridiculous comments on bbvip topics and I discovered that this girl had copied and pasted my comments onto her blog because it somehow helped describe the feeling you get from looking at a certain picture of GD.

I mean I don't mind, but she didn't need to excuse my spelling for me XD

You expect spazz to be full and unadulterated grammar from heaven??? PSHT!

I find it hilarious how my nubcak-ness is strewn all over the internet though....it's like the secret code that binds cyberspace together.

Oh the mystery that is nubcak....all it is really is a glorified purposeful typo that I've formed an overwhelming attachment to.

aaaand I've just realized that a lot of the people reading this are just going to have no idea what I'm talking about.

My sincerest of apologies.

Sometimes I tend to just get carried away with myself..I do try to make sense honest!

Anyway, I'm going to finish for today, before today is actually finished.

(which it will be in 8 minutes)

Good Night Lovely Ones!

Love From Minnie

P.S. Thanks for watching this space :D

So far Above me Yet I, Know Your Heart Belongs to Only Me ~

This weekend was pretty busy, but the great thing was I got to see all my grandparents in the space of two days...something that doesn't happen a lot.

Yesterday we went to Hull to grandpas house because we wanted to see my cousin and aunt again before they went back to Holland.

Its been a while since we've all been together, so dad took me and Sarah to go visit grandma at the old people's home.

Its the first time I've seen her in ages and its also the first time she didn't recognize me.

It was pretty heartbreaking actually. She kept asking,

'Why are you here?'

And kept standing up as if she thought she wasn't supposed to be with us.

Thankfully she got more comfortable with us and asked dad,

'Are these your girls?'

And when we left we told her we loved her and she said,

'I love you too.'

It's a sad experience though.

I hate Alzheimers disease...

And its worse that grandma and grandpa have to be separated even though they are both still alive.

but, I guess that's life and we have to make the best of it.

So anyway, as the weekend was busy I decided to chill the day away drawing my own face...which I know, is a weird thing to do, but actually its the best drawing I've done in a while...as far as likeness is concerned.

It looks very much like the picture I copied it off, so I think that's why I'm pleased with it.

It doesn't feel like I'm drawing myself either. Its like some random person.

But anyway, I'm going to try and finish it tomorrow and then start on something else.

Maybe a scene...or a picture of two people...not sure.

----

Sam was sick today...he vomited shoelaces.

Weird huh?

Its funny, but recently he's taken a fancy to shoelaces.

You'd think it would be something that a puppy does, not an 8 year old dog, but Samuel is ALWAYS contrary to the rules.

He has proven all by himself that an old dog can learn new tricks...

Though technically he isn't really 'old' he is a healthy adult...other than the shoelace vomiting.

----

I feel like I'm slowing down again. I find it hard to motivate myself for long periods of time.

It's so frustrating when you have to wait for things to happen. I thought I was a patient person, but obviously I wasn't as long suffering as I had imagined.

With other people, I can manage, but myself? Its a different matter all together.

Its annoying when you know you are trying hard and there seems to be no movement in life at all.

Its like going up a steep hill in 5th gear WITH ICE ON THE ROAD.

Maybe I should take advantage of this slowing down and take a look at my other options.

I don't know...it just seems recently my path in the journey of life is experiencing foggy weather and I'm just waiting for the mist to lift and the bright sunshine to wash over everything...

WTFUDGE is up with all these metaphors??? hahaha

I just want to have beautiful moments that's all...and I'm just waiting for them to arrive.

I feel like nothing memorable has happened recently.

Just living day to day to day...it gets so stale.

A 22 year old should not feel this way...but maybe I'm just getting depressed because, it's late, and its dark, and for the past few days the weather is getting noticeably colder.

I need happy and exciting times to help me forget the depression of winter...

At least I will be able to wear hats and scarves again, I love that...and I can buy a nice new coat.

So I guess not everything about winter is bad...and there is always the hope of snow.

---

Just finished watching episode 7 of Hotaru no Hikari season 2.

It was SOOOO lush asdkjasdhjkasd

I want a buchou so bad...he is so cute!!!

And even though the cute extremely attractive and gorgeous younger guy understands Hotaru more, he doesn't have the special connection she has with Buchou.

Which just tells you that two people who are extremely different from each other can still be completely gorgeous together.

Ideal types can sometimes blind you from what is perfect for you...I bet lots of people have missed out that way.

Since when do you choose a best friend by how they look anyway?

It's not something you care about...there is more magic to it than that.

Anyway, it's almost half past twelve o' clock in the morning and I should sleep...I just, wish I had something to look forward to.

Good Night Lovely People

Love Min

P.S. Happy Independence Day to my Malaysia family I hope you all have fun and look beautiful and handsome...wejhkjwerhvwfhhwyiurlhwkefq;ewiugqwker,h;qwlehfqwlkf,wnfkwe

:D

...my country doesn't have an Independence Day

but our national holiday was yesterday,

Its the last one before school term starts again...but I have no school to go too *sigh*

I feel like a loser right now...

NEED HUG!

-----

Pining ~

Kindness ???

Today was good.

Just like yesterday felt fulfilling because I worked hard, today felt fulfilling because I chilled hard.

And I say 'chill' meaning the greatest sense of the word.

I don't think I've been to anywhere quite like grandmas house...I feel just as at ease there as I here at my own house.

It's like a family treasure, I just LOVE grandmas house...I was so spoiled when I was little, because for 7 years I was the only grandchild.

This meant that I got ALL the attention from my grandparents like ALL the candy and presents and wonderful things...and on top of all of this my grandparents had the coolest house with an awesome garden...(AND IM SORRY MICO I FORGOT TO TAKE PICTURES).

I used to have friends coming up to me and asking if they could share my grandma with me.

I feel so blessed, when I was little I thought everyone had families like that, then one day at school my friend told me that she only had two grandparents and I got shocked because I thought everyone had all four like me.

It shows how much we take for granted, we can't ever forget how blessed we are with whatever we have...there are always others who have less.

(11:11!!!!)

I love catching it ^_^

So yes I was at grandmas all day today...mum wanted to buy some curtains (again) so we went to town to do some shopping, but came back empty handed because mum couldn't find what she wanted.

We only bought some coffee so we could have a sit down, well actually, I had iced peach tea...it was lush. :)

Later Dora and her hubby and Judah came over for dinner because they have never been to grandmas house before.

It was just a relaxing time.

Grandma showed Dora mine and Sarah's baby album....

I was like,

'Yes I am naked there, but I don't do that sort of picture anymore...I'm modest now.'

lolol

It was so funny,

Dora was all the way through my pictures -

'Awww Minnie, you were so pretty then - well you still are, but you know, what I mean!!'

I was like -

'...thanks.'

Then as soon as she got to Sarah's baby photos, she didn't say anything, she just burst out laughing.

Which is hilarious because thats how everyone reacted to Sarah when she was a baby...

The most used phrase when a person first saw Sarah was,

'Isn't she funny?'

Sarah brought humour into our family haha.

AND!!!

Man U won their match today 3-0 Which is very excellent...good job boys, good job.

To be honest, other than that...I've not done anything today...its been a chill relax day.

My fears of having a bad Saturday were proven wrong though, thankfully.

AND thanks to my YJ eonnie, I have now found something to fill the space Avatar left when I completed it...

It is callllleeedd -

kimi ni todoke

And I can't wait to watch it!!!

asdhjkshdjsdbhasgdjasgdhagsdjsdjhajshdaiuhjkasdaslhka ~~~~

Ohhh I apologize - this is a late night blog, so I may sound kind of monotonous.

I always try to write my posts before 10pm so I'm at least a little bit concious, but the past few days I haven't achieved that...sorry If I'm boring you.

This coming Monday is a National Holiday in my country so dad says he is going to take Sarah and I to York and buy us pizza --- this is the ORIGINAL York by the way - not the New one everyone goes on about - they just stole the name XD

I LOVE York though...it's amazing.

HEY its 12am!!! Happy Sunday the 29th of August Everyone :D

I hope your day is beautiful.

Which reminds me, yesterday was missing something lovely :(

DNL!

Today can't be like that...I will change that fact riiight now...It seems I will have to take the initiative....again....

...well...it was better than nothing I guess ... *sigh* OMO!!!

And Im gonna Say night now,

Love Min

P.S. I watched Oklahoma! for the first time today...it was cute

The Butterflies Seem to Always Arrive at the Same Time as You

There are some things money can't buy, but I already have those things, so now I need some money XD.

And that's pretty much what my day has been about - finding ways to get/make money.

So I furthered my shoving of my artwork into people's faces so they would want to commission something from me - but so far no go. I need to do some more up to date stuff and TBH the more I look at my pictures the more they appear amateur to me....I'm trying to improve myself though. *sigh*

Then I decided to make a sellers account on Amazon and flog my old uni text books - I don't know why I bought them anyway - the year I actually made an effort and studied before exams was the year that I failed...how ironic and discouraging.

That's over now anyway...I hope someone buys the books off me, that would be OSM!

My final desperate act was to make a more current CV and apply for a job vacancy at this new clothes store that's opening in the White Rose Centre (a mall thingy that's near my house).

The reason I did this was because I was complaining to my dad about how I wanted to go to Singapore in October and he was like,

'Get a job and you can go.'

Which translated in my mind is,

'Get a job then Minnie and I will help you find a flight - take you and pick you up from the airport and buy you some essentials for your trip.'

Its a long shot but...I kind of already have maybe 3/4 of the money I would need...Its just a very sadlihkasdfm;apsfoj;lasfjas[of;asf situation for me.

Ah well... *sigh*

Here's some pictures from my day....enjoy ~

This morning I came downstairs and saw a rainbow on the wall - I don't know about your religion, but in mine rainbows are a sign that God will always keep His promises, which is quite a nice thing to remember at the beginning of a new day...but its just very pretty anyway haha.

Tonight, I got bored and had a nice few hours of gameplay on the PS2 - nothing calms the nerves quite like constantly hacking at monsters - though I do tend to get a bit verbal and shout at the screen if things don't go how I want them too...today I told an unhelpful shopkeeper to 'Shut up'...and shouted 'HOW DARE YOU.' at multiple monsters who managed to get a hit at one of my characters.

Some cutscene - you know those moments that are really awkward? And if it happened in real life it would be completely disturbing, but we accept it because its a game??? omg XD

Ah, there's my boy - I am very maternal about him...hit him at your peril...I will stab you to death with an oversized katana if you even dare to touch one hair on his pixelated head.

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Didn't take many pictures today, as you can see...

but now I'm really tired.

Dad brought curry home for dinner again tonight....I'm so glad...I was really craving it.

Oh look its now Saturday...I dislike Saturdays...they are so boring...

Maybe I should change that, maybe I should do something on Saturdays that makes me like it more than any other day....I'm just talking nonsense now...but, maybe my nonsense has a bit of sense...we should make the most of our lives...and our days...and our minutes...because they don't last long, they go so fast.

I just don't want to be left behind feeling like I missed out because I never even tried.

It happened to me so many times and now, I'm sick of it.

I thank everyone I know, for inspiring me to work harder...

Some of you go out of your way to give me encouragement and I am so grateful for that.

Some of you are ignorant and not encouraging at all and you make me want to prove you wrong...so in a way I benefit from your rubbishness.

And then there are others who's lives and the way they live it encourage me even if they are far away...or dead...they still make me want to better myself.

Thinking about it - I think this is a great responsibility that we all have.

We all have a direct and indirect effect on the people we meet...people look up to us and watch us, that's why we must always watch our actions, to be a good example for those who are observing what we do.

No matter how insignificant you think you are...you are definitely very important to someone whether you are aware of it or not.

At least one person thinks you are important - me.

Thanks for reading my 1am thoughts. You are complete DARLINGS *HUGS*

Love From Minnie

P.S. please someone encourage me to do something wild...my energies are too evenly placed...I want adrenaline rushes.....My life is so dull right now....

My Head is Spinning - GET A GRIP GIRL - Unless You're Dying to Cry Your Heart Out ~

Today, I feel like I have achieved a lot, because I have been busying myself, but in fact...I've just been procrastinating again.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I have done a bit more that I usually do, but whether or not I get anything from it is another matter entirely.

and I'm SOOOO tempted to dip into or rather USE the entirety of the savings grandma gave me and go to Singapore in October.

But that might be (IS) completely silly of me and it still wouldn't pay for somewhere for me to stay and food and shizz and it wouldn't pay for Sarah either.

AND if I do manage to get a job in enough time before then...would they really give me a holiday off in such a short time.

AND if I manage to make enough money with my art work, tickets for the kpop thingy will probably be sold out.

Am I being too negative here?

XD

Anyway... as long as some of my beloveds can meet each other I will be very happy...AND see big bang at the same time *sigh* Its like heaven...I cannot comprehend...like something from a dream.

Maybe its good that It's kind of hard for me to go, if I met them...its most probable I would cry like a noob and embarrass everyone LOOOL

Anyhoo!

I made a tumblr today for my arty farty stuff, come check it out :D -

http://minnienubcak.tumblr.com/

I've not posted much yet, but watch this space.

I got another request for a picture today too. That's two I have to do now. Hopefully I can get them done fast.

Unfortunately...its for people I know so I always give them a £10 discount...which tends to add up.

My kindness is overwhelming haha. Nah, hopefully it will come back ten fold.

Do I seem obsessed with money lately?

I'm really sorry :(

I'm not becoming a misery scrooge face I swear.

It's just I made a promise to myself that I will see a bit more of the world within the next twelve months, and I want to keep my promise.

At least I have a passport now (which works).

Even though Jae told me there was no point in boasting about having a working passport if I don't even go anywhere.

...Its nice to see him say such lovely to the point things again, rofl.

Goshh I want tea so much, my food from dinner isn't settling properly.

Mum bought six new tea cups. They are so cute with animals on them - so my style haha.

There is a sheep, a pony, a owl, a kingfisher, a duck and a bluetit

They are so adorable I will take a picture and show you XD

In fact I just made a video LOLOL, its lame and it finishes too soon, but I'm sure you'll catch my drift hahahaha (cough).

Ohh but youtube is uploading so slow...168 mins for a 1 minute vid? That's ridiculous!!! If it keeps at this rate, Imma cancel the upload and just try again tomorrow.

In the meantime, here are some pictures from my day :D

I have had the creative buzz for the past few days and these are a few of the products.

So mum does this arts and crafts thing at work with the kids. And tomorrow she is making Native American Indian Head Dresses with them. SHE was supposed to make one for an example, but she just kind of told me to make it...so this is my effort at a head dress XD.

This is the head band part...I got a strip of green paper and cut out pieces of gold paper. Then I stuck the gold onto the green to create a slanty pattern so it would look lovely and shiny - because I love shiny things MUAHAHAHHAHAHA

Then I stuck the feathers on and hey PRESTO!! A pretty Indian Head Dress made by a bored English girl, who is not even nearly a Native American.

Also, I started working on my Spaniel again after a few weeks delay (or a month). Trying to make the right ear look as pretty as the left one, but its got a long way to go considering, the left ear has about 6 hours worth of work put into it, whereas the right one has about 20 mins of scribble.

But forget that spaniel...my baby has the most scrumfulliest cuddliest nommable ears EVAH...such a soft fluffyness wdhakjsfsgfuksdjfbsjkdfhkjsd you just want to GLOMP him.

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And thats my picture spam for the day haha.

Oh wow, its actually Friday now...the day goes so fast.

Last night I had a fantastic nights sleep with NO dreams, you know the deep sleep where you just don't even want to wake up even though it's morning...

INCREDIBLE!

But then I remembered my doggy needed a pee and breakfast so I forced myself out of bed before he had the chance to come to the bottom of my stairs and screech up them as if he were starving hungry (something which he does almost ever morning). When in reality he is a little fatty, who is treated like a baby.

Ok, I better sign off now because, I still have to wash the dishes from dinner and its already 12:18 am.

Good Night to my Delicious Gorgeous People Who Read this Shizzle

I love you more more...

From Min

P.S. Lily I'm sorry you didn't know my real name until today HAHAHA I really thought you already knew.

P.S.S. I wonder if my Solar Deluxe will arrive tomorrow?? I shall spazz out if it does and make a video tour of it (a bit late but meh, I want my triplets to be able to see the inside)

P.S.S.S. I MISSED MY YJ TODAY!!!!!! Lets speak soon eonnie!!! I hope you are fine *HUUUGGSSS* My day is not complete without you.

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Night Night Everyone :)

You and Life Remain Beautiful

It's been a weird day.

I'm not going to lie, it's been a weird week.

And by weird I mean - not in the good sense of the word.

Firstly, my nights have been so unusual, restless and for almost a week I've been having strange dreams. Which is funny because I hardly ever dream.

and irritating for Sarah because if I get too freaked out by dreams I get into her bed, which has happened four times this week...sorry Sarah.

It's not that I get scared...its just when I wake up in the night, it feels so terribly lonely and silent. Its just nice to know that there is some life in the room --- Even if it does get angry when I pull the covers off of it XD

Also, I've been trying hard with my artwork this week - practising finishing sketches in under 20 minutes this is what I have managed -

The reason I am doing this is to practice catching some ones likeness in a minimal amount of time...

because I want to maybe try doing street portraits next summer...well, I have plenty of time to practice anyway.

I'm trying desperately to flog pictures since I promised myself that all money I get from my artwork will go towards the travelling fund...as will the money I save in my money box (which btw has £28.o4 now :D I counted it again today).

I hate money sometimes....Its so cold and taunting.

But I sort of made a vow that I would try my best...because my dreams are meant to come true.

....and you know what?

I'm so tired...I think my sleepless nights are catching up on me...I'm struggling at the moment to keep my eyes open....many apologies if there are typoes in this post *sigh*

Yep, its another short one folks, I hope you don't mind.

Much love to you all and take care today.

From Min

P.S. There is always hope and nothing is over until it is over.

Short and to the (Bullet) Point

I'm only going to write a short one tonight because I'm really tired.

I just ate pizza and it feels so heavy in my stomach.

In fact, imma do a bullet point blog instead for a little change. (and its quicker for me)

• Woke up too late again, restless nights taking their toll
• Couldn't take Sam out yet because it was pouring down with rain
• Realized I was home alone
• Made a cup of coffee
• Turned the PC on to check usual FB and twitter
• Checked my phone (no messages)
• Talked to Mico for a little while on msn
• Made lunch for Dad
• Dad came home for lunch
• Took Sam out because it had stopped raining
• The Internet connection went off
• Despite my efforts it wouldn't connect back
• I got irritated
• I sat looking at the screen for a while
• Then decided to draw
• Started practising my fast sketches
• Managed to do four (Park Bom, Daesung, Junsu and Jobie)
• Note : I will post them on another blog, I dont have the scans on this comp
• Started chatting with YJ on msn :)
• Chatted with Zaty on twitter
• They both liked the pictures I dedicated to them - no guesses as to which picture went to which person haha.
• Jae came online after like 5 days of absence *cries with happiness*
• It's 11:11 right now and what I want most of all is for him ^ to be better
• but forget wishing
• Prayers work better (obviously)
• Big Bang released Beautiful Hangover MV
• It was interesting...and sleek
• Got sick of the internet
• Went to eat pizza that dad had made
• Watched Nodame Cantabile with Sarah
• Tried to draw more but I'd lost the vibe
• Had the most irritating interruptions while watching the drama
• Sarah and I got kicked out of the front room - end of watching
• Decided that all I can do now is sleep
• Not many bulletpoints are there?
• Nevertheless, at least this time...today feels complete

Don't know what else to say.

Sarah is being bumfaced, so I better finish here.

Love from Min

P.S. - I want to get a necklace with the letters TC on it one day

P.S.S. - I wanna give YJ her piccy ASAP! :)

P.S.S.S. - I want Jae to feel perfectly delicious very soon

Night Night Wonderfuls

In.Conclusion is In.Conceivable

'Cos when IIII'M WITHHH HIM, I AMMMM THINKING OF YOUUUU.'

That song sound HORRIBLE out of context. But I've been kind of addicted to it for a few days now.

It's ironic really.

My version is

'Heck! When I'm with anyone I'm thinking of you...even G Dragon.'

but not in the same context as Katy Perry...sleeping with someone she doesn't really love...people these days EISH! They have no idea of romance.

Why did I get to this topic??? ROFL

SO!! I made another VLOG, because...I'm really feeling VLOGGY recently. It gets me focused on something and I can zone out for a while.

Actually, this time round, I talked for over 10 mins XD

I'm SO sorry, you don't have to watch it if you don't want rofl.

Its just one of my ways of releasing myself from boredom...

In this vid however...I talk about big bang - watch for the change in my behaviour. It was terribly hard for me to keep control of the spazz that wanted to manifest XD



LOOOOOOL

Can you even believe I am 22 years old?

I'm the picture of youth!!!!

HA! Thats a lie, you should have seen me the other night when I couldn't sleep waking up at 3am and being so restless then continuing the day looking like I was over 70.

But hey! We all have out good days and bad days.

Good weeks and bad weeks...

I love this song...



...girls like these types of songs :P

BUT GOD I LOVE THOSE METAPHORS!!!

Its a clever 'you are an awesome lady' song :)

Of course it's clever!!! It's Relient K - the kings of metaphorical lyrics...

And that my friends, is one of the many reasons that I love them.

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I started re-playing Final Fantasy X with Sarah the other day.
My maternal instincts for Tidus came back viciously...I SWEAR he is my RPG child!
I get so mad when a monster tries to kill him.

But it felt nice and refreshing to get my gaming head back on. I've missed playing on a console these passed few years.

Then the other day, YJ and I were talking about awesome PS2 games and I suddenly got this CRAVING to sit in front of a TV and control a computer animated human for a couple of hours.

3 hours EXACTLY in fact.

Although I have been known to sit there for days straight, back in the good old days, when I had the hope of getting a great job and degree.

All though I didn't know that my triplets or Zaty or Jae or Lily or the Aussies existed then so I was incomplete inside.

Then one day it clicked!

'AH! That's why I felt so lonely!'

because how can you feel complete when you haven't even met the people who hold a piece of your heart?

I wonder how many missing pieces I still have yet to find?

Isn't it a wonder!! A BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL WONDER!!!

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So I was in town today and I went into HMV (which is a music, dvd, gadget. HEAVEN, if you didn't know).

I was browsing through the magazine section and picked up the latest NYLON issue. Then I noticed that the DKNY AD had a familiar face as the model.

NONE other than the man who has been shoved in my face for the past month.

Francisco Lachowski.

I smiled knowing that when Sarah saw it she would have to be controlled and not scream in this very public of environments.

It was THE perfect torture of the day.

And was extremely satisfying to watch.

*SIGH*

Its nearly time to sleep. In fact I will be trying to sleep very soon. trying

I'm sick of tossing and turning and having bad dreams...

This week has been a test of how I handle things...but I'm concerned...

I just want peace of mind, that's all.

Even in town passing shops and seeing certain things was like torture.

LOL I'm being so cryptic and confusing.

I'm sorry toward my generous readers.

I'll go to sleep now...I always have hope for tomorrow.

Good Night

Love From Minnie

P.S. Will this be the final night before the day when things are right?
Is this prayer I say today, the one that will make things ok?

Where on Earth???

I am currently GAWKING over a tumblr called 1000 most romantic places in the world.

(Check it out, its the shizz: http://romanticplaces.tumblr.com)

It's kind of visually stunning to maximum levels.

It makes me sick at heart that I will never be able to go to them ALL.

Well, I've been to one of them so Edinburgh can be crossed off LOL...not that I can remember much of being there considering I was 3 or 4 at the time.

All I remember is walking along a beach at night and finding a starfish and there was a fair in the distance and then going to some ones house and their kids tried to make me wear a kilt which I violently refused and then hid under a table to get away from them while all the parents laughed.

I remember weird little things like this.

So yeasss I'm getting increasingly jealous of those people who are just able to up and travel to various gorgeous places in the world and have lots of wonderful experiences like that.

It would be so cool to have one of those romantic lifestyles, you know the kind - You just leave home with a backpack and a few belongings and travel the world earning money by street painting. Collecting memories and wonderful things as you go along.

Then when you get old you have this amazing heritage to leave for your grandchildren and they will want to be just like you.

I wish I could be like that...I mean, I probably could, but I have this mental barrier that stops me from progressing once I get to a certain point.

For example - the day I finished univerity -

'I'm free now!!! I have the world at my door!!'

A few weeks later -

'I have to get a job to earn money so I can do the things I want, but then I only have a certain amount of holiday time to do those things in.'

Ah me and my overthinking - It even gets in the way of my dreams.

I should actually think like this -

'I have to get a job and save a LOT of money so I can then drop the job and do the things that I want.'

Or something like that LOL

OMO! There is only one section in this tumblr about England and it says we have bad food XD

It may be basic, but Its definitely not bad...I'd describe it as - HEARTY and FILLING.

And it's kept me alive for 22 years...although to be honest, my blood is probably almost pure curry...I think I was weaned on curry...I don't understand why I still like eating the stuff.

But yes, I want to travel...sooooo badly!!!

Won't someone just carry me away??

*begs*

*cries*

Well my day!!!

Its been....actually, just watch this - I explain it better here XD *lazy*



Its true what I said though.

I just can't seem to find anything to do...I mean, of course, there is stuff I can do, but my drive seems to have dissapeared...along with other things.

I try to keep my mind active but it's like a boomerang returning to the same thoughts.

LOL you can tell I'm writing this at a previous time of day than the above paragraphs.

I get so negative at night time.

And I think that's what keeps me awake and restless during the night. I despair of myself at times.

I wish I could just shut my mind off at night, in fact, I wish I could switch everything off...even feelings and be in like this comatose state where my body can just re-energize.

I have this like feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach.... :S
I wish it would go away...and that every nice feeling in the world would come back.

I really hate swearing - sorry about the abrupt change in subject.

Maybe that's one of the things that makes me seem uptight...but it just seems so cheap to me.

Its like the fashion crime of wording...you can have a better way of expressing yourself, yet you choose to use cheap words - like buying fake designer stuff.

That's how I see it anyway, but then I'm like the English language police ROFL.

Obviously I sometimes swear, but I feel really common after I've said it

I don't know why I'm talking about this...well I guess it's just another part of me. Another little glimpse into how I tick.

Even though at the moment my ticking is a little off.

I'm really kind of not ok...

Gonna go to sleep and hope that I don't have disturbing dreams about rejection and heartbreak.

Goodnight Loves

From Minnie

P.S. I'm sorry for being so darned emo...read the romantic places blog...its really lovely.


lovely....

P.S.S. Lily just made me laugh...SHE IS AWESOME!!! Thats a first gen!! :)


P.S.S.S Someone in my news Feed on FB just called Man U noobs because they drew.... LOOOOOL You don't call the ALMIGHTY REDS noobs...unless you are a know nothing noob.

'I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me... everyday.'

Thinking of You - Katy Perry

(I'm listened to Katy Perry and I liked it...damn)

but really, T__T.

Anyway (which is apparently my favourite word - I must like changes of subject),

I have decided to make this blog post a little different...it may be slightly terrifying.

It reveals the deception of makeup for example :S

And I just would like to show a little bit more of my life...what makes me tick that kind of shizzle...something a bit better than answering boring surveys...though, maybe a bit messier

But anyway (OMG I SAID IT AGAIN!!!),

I woke up at 7:45 today - which I'm happy about. It the first time this week that I've woken up before 10am....it took till Friday for my sleep pattern to become normal....OMO!

I would sort out my irregular sleeping habits but....I don't want to really.

When I woke up it was raining...

Yes, I know I have a dirty window...when I clean my room I ALWAYS forget the window.

I love my windows, because when it rains the sound is like when you are in a tent...and I LOVE being in a tent when it rains. It's the most snuggly feeling ever!!!

I thought it would be cold but when I took Sam out it was actually really warm because half the sky was black clouds and the other half was sunny....there was a rainbow too.

COMPLETELY LUSHNESS - buuuut I forgot to bring my camera, so that picture is just for my memory haha.

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For the Past few days I've been having a make up fast because I don't want my skin to rot.

However, I thought I would do a before and after for my blog.

Me when I just got home from walking Sam -

*Rained on with lack of sleep* jk, I always look a zombie :D

Ready for some face Painting?

Thats right, cover your eyebags with glasses.

AFTER PAINTING IS COMPLETE -

Nope, it hasn't helped - I still look a mess OMO!! *EYES* = *scared*

'I'm not wasting time doing this crap anymore' :P

(OHHH my clothes hanging over the banisters hahaha)

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Yes, I am a mess, but! I am a happy mess today :D

-------

This picture was taken at 10am -

I'm now on my third cup of teA...and YJ is gone to make me coco ROFL.

OH OH OH (OH AH OH :D)

I have some pictures of when me and my family went for a walk last weekend.

The Place is called Ilkley and its build on a moor...some of the most beautiful English scenery can be seen here...and I'm proud to say its less than 40 mins drive from my house...in fact, its some of the most beautiful scenery in Britain :D.

And I'm sharing it with the world now :)

Aren't I just the best?!! .... no, I know, NVM!!!

'And did those feet in ancient time
Walk upon England's mountains green
And was the holy lamb of God
On England's pleasant pastures seen'

'And did the countenance divine
Shine forth upon our clouded hills
And was Jerusalem builded here
Among those dark Satanic mills'

'Bring me my bow of burning gold
Bring me my arrows of desire
Bring me my spears o'clouds unfold
Bring me my chariot of fire'

'I will not cease from mental fight
Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand
'Til we have built Jerusalem
In England's green and pleasant land
'Til we have built Jerusalem
In England's green and pleasant land'

And those were just a few lovely pictures of my 'green and pleasant land'

with the lyrics from the hymn 'Jerusalem' which pretty much is saying, if there was no evil in this country it basically would be heaven. LOOOL

What?? It's an English anthem..we are proud XD

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This is what I am doing right now

I love my triplets :)

^_^ Ohhhh that big space annoys me!!! I should edit my screencaps better :D Do you mind the big space???? Did you even notice it until I mentioned it?? Do you even care??....I thought not :P

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Some things about me -

I write quotes that I like on pieces of paper, which sometimes get scattered all over the house -

Mum usually throws them in the bin and I have to save them haha

I write a letter to myself and then leave it for two years before I open it, because I like to see how much I've changed. -

No one sends letters any more, so I have to write them to myself haha

I drink a LOT of tea (tea update ^_^) -

I've always written crap in diaries too :D -

I own craploads of books -

But there are only a few absolutely cracking ones that I could read more than once :D

There are some missing, but you get my drift ~

This is my most precious possession -

Hullo thur :)

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Here is a funny thing -

Two nights ago I dreamed someone was VERY mean to me (they put a huge slug on my hand) - on that same night my sister dreamed that she killed that person and two members of their family.

No one messes with me and gets away with it hahaha, not even in dreamland.

Though I do worry about Sarah's mind sometimes :D

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Oh, its raining again - I wanted to take Sam out too...I shall have to wait until it stops.

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SO enough of the pictures for now!!!

Today I have been completely and utterly without anything to do.

Sarah told me to go get a job as an English speaking nannie in the Black Forest and sent me a link of that exact job advertisement....

I was like

0_0

I aint working in Germany...

However, if there is anything going further east, I would consider it very seriously...haha

and why not?

My dream was always to work abroad anyway...it's sort of being pushed to the side by the need of money though...

My poor dream.

but, I guess dreams only come true at the exact moment they are supposed to.

I just have to wait patiently and work for my hearts desire.

Happiness is always there if people are willing to reach for it.

Oh there are so many things I want!

I get so depressed about how everything seems so far away (literally too)...

The other day I got my full grades in the post from all three years at uni and it was kind of depressing, because the subject I worked my butt off for the most was still just a B (I knowI should be happy with that grade but I'm not, lol).

I was like,

'DAD, IM NOT 'A' STAR PERSON, I'M SECOND RATE.'

My dad was like,

'Minnie what are you talking about?'

I said,

'I worked so hard on Parasitology and all I have is a stinking 'B' to show for it.'

Daddy was like,

'How does that make you second rate?'

I said,

'Because even in my best subject I didn't get top marks.'

he was like,

'Then it's not your best subject...your best subject is what you excel in the most...now, other than being a silly girl what are you best at?'

Me,

'I'm not silly, you're silly!!! I'm best at failing!!!'

he said,

'No - I would say you were best at art. Aren't you?'

I reply,

'Yes...'

Then he said,

'Well just because you are not as good at one thing doesn't mean you are second rate...It's what you are best at that matters. And you are TOP class at your best Minnie.'

Isn't that nice?

I think everyone should be told they are great at something.

In fact -

Readers - You are fantastic at putting up with my shizzle :D

Friends - You are the best at making me happy when I'm sad. And making me happier when I'm already happy

Family - You are the best at telling me when I am a noob...even if I don't accept it graciously.

YOU ARE ALL JUST THE BEST!!! So good that I can't possibly live without you (apart from maybe some of the readers who I may not know and in that case - HELLO!! :D)

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I was stalking tumblr today :D

This was just one of those things that you read and say,

'OMG that like ME!!!'

and then you show Sarah and she's like,

'Yup, thats you.'

Then this one just made me LOL -



And this one made me nod in agreement -



I wasted tons of time on tumblr today, its DEVASTATING!

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The person you think about when you wake up is either the person who makes you the happiest or the person who gives you the most pain...

If you think about yourself you are in trouble haha.

I'm going to try and remember who I think about first when I wake up in the morning.

It might be a REVELATION...

I'll let you know if I remember....actually it depends who I think of :D

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I just ate this



I feel like such a cannibal.

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What an uneventful day for me...and I am worried too :(

*sigh*

Silence is deadly.

I will sign off on a positive note though!!!

MY DREAM HAS TO COME TRUE SO EVERYTHING WILL BE OK!!!

VERY VERY OK!!!

I should go bath my dog now, he stinks.

I love you SOOOO MUCH dsakdhkjsagfsaugfjkasfbasfba!!!!

Words cannot describe how much :)

Love From Min

P.S. List of things I feel like -

Watching The Notebook because I LOVE IT!!! SOSOSOSO MUCH.
Reading Twilight because my kind Mico gave me the e-book
Eating curry
Hugging Tightly

P.S.S.

Fly me to the moon, let me play among the stars, let me see what spring is like on Jupiter or Mars.

In other words - Hold My Hand
In other words - Darling, kiss me

Fill my heart with song and let me sing forever more. You are all I long for - all I worship and adore.

In other words - please be true
In other words - I love you


:D

LOVELY SONG

Be ok now...