My Sanctuary

Im sat in my grandmas living room and I'm soooo hot!!!

The fire is on and the radiators (which I am leaning against)

I can't be bothered to move - I'm too tired.

Sarah is already asleep on the other side of the room hahah aww bless her she is hugging a cushion its so cute...if she reads this she will hit me kekekeke.

We were at church today and there were a group of us talking.

Sarah was the youngest in the group and the tallest and I was the eldest and the smallest...I was also informed that I acted the youngest, but I'm not sure I believe them...my best friend was doing a pretty good job of acting the most immature. I think it was a draw.

She was showing us her new £375 Vivienne Westwood bag that her boyfriend bought her for their 5th anniversery.

I think boys like this happen to be very useful ROFL.

There is this guy at church called Philip and we were all laughing about him because we decided he was 'a very nice boy'...and my friend kept saying his name really loud without realising he was sat right behind us...and I think he heard...poor guy.

My best friend is called Philippa so I tried saying PHILIPPA!!! really loudly so he would think he heard wrong...but I don't think it worked ROFL.

Our conversations were something like this.

Me: Remember when we used to get told off for showing our shoulders at church?

Philippa: Yeah...one tiny bit of skin, even by accident when we bent over and we were screamed at.

Sarah: Its not like there was anyone to show off skin too.

Me: LOL yeah

Philippa's sister: *looks at Philip* WELL THERE IS NOW!

Everyone: LOOOOOOOOOOL PHILIP

Its a good job Sarah and I only go to Manchester church once a month or else poor Philip would be getting self conscious.

The things girls talk about when they are bored. Sheesh...Well, at least its a time where we can act immature together.

When you get past 20 you start to realize how little you see your childhood friends anymore...but at least when you get together you can let go of inhibitions and politeness and just relax in their company.

I adore people who I feel comfortable with. You know the type of people you can feel tired around and fall asleep around.

If I ever fall asleep in your company you will know I feel comfortable in your presence..its the most ultimate gift of trust I give to friend haha.

--

ok I'm home now and its 12 am-ish.

I really hate getting home late from Manchester, I get so irritable. And I have this growing sense of dread...which I really dont want to have.

I went to a meeting on Saturday and it gave information on how the brain works. Anyway, when you think negatively these toxins enter your brain and make it dry out which kills the brain cells. However, positive thought's counter attack this toxin....this is actually scientifically proven as well, Im just not explaining it properly because I'm tired.

but anyway, my point is - I don't want my brain to die and malfunction so I'm trying to think in a positive way...the thing is, tonight I'm finding it super hard...its not helping that my face and nose itches like crazy due to either a cold or an allergy.

And then I keep thinking about people who I'm not very fond of, which isn't very beneficial when you are trying to be optimistic. So I keep trying to find things about those people so that I could bring myself to like them...but what I really need to do is just forgive and forget whatever it is about them that bugs me.

I think its best to allow love to conquer fear

because I'm scared of a lot of things...especially loss. And I think sometimes this fear stops me from moving forward.

In the end God would never let me go without anything I needed...I should trust Him more and stop being so afraid of losing what He already gave to me.

I should have learned by now...almost everything I thought I had lost in the past has always come back or was never even gone in the first place.

and with that note, I'm going to sleep

So very very very tired.

LOVE from Min